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Heidi Klum ‘opens up’ just enough to tell us to back the fuck up.

So Heidi’s on the cover of Elle, and this is some bullshit.

Honestly, why bother doing an interview if you’re not going to actually reveal anything. Call me whatever, but yeah, I wanna hear all the ugly details. That chick off Mad Men, Peggy (Elisabeth Moss), said the other week that her ex was really good at pretending to be a normal human or some shit. No, wait, this is what it was:

One of the greatest things I heard someone say about [Fred Armisen] is, ‘He’s so great at doing impersonations. But the greatest impersonation he does is that of a normal person.’ To me, that sums it up.

That’s awesome. That’s the kind of shit I wanna hear. If you’re just gonna be like ‘I’m opening up about my divorce, but I won’t talk about it at all’ then what’s the fucking point?

Basically the whole interview is her being like ‘divorce is hard, especially because Seal and I are super famous.’

Apart from that, she says that

People don’t need to know who did what.

And talks about how she’s focusing on her kids

I’m a lioness. I have four cubs. I’m a mom. I want to take care of my kids and protect them. I don’t want to talk about them, or him, or me.

I don’t want to talk about me, that’s why I decided to do this interview about my divorce. What the fuck, Heidi? This might just be the most pointless article of all time ever. Realistically, it’s not even great blog material, but I went and saw Aqua (yes, the band) last night, and I am incredibly hungover tired.

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4 Comments Post a comment
  1. roobybooby #

    i will not buy the magazine. i don’t like her at all.

    March 13, 2012
    • I don’t mind her, but I certainly wouldn’t buy this to read about her talking about nothing, haha.

      March 13, 2012

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