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So there’s a trailer for the Snooki & JWOWW spin-off.

 

It’s happening. Watch the trailer first, and then we’ll just run through a few bits that grabbed my attention.

 

‘I am moving in with a pregnant. Engaged. Snooki.’ I love how she says it like she’s got no other options. As if it’s that or living under a bridge.

‘Honestly I didn’t really know that I could make a baby. So the fact that I can reproduce, is very scary.’ Someone, anyone who watches this show, please tell me that she thought she was unable to conceive because of some prior medical issue, not just because it never occurred to her to use protection, because if that’s the case, then she’s absolutely right. It IS very scary. How do you not know that as a twenty-whatever year old? Do they not do sex ed in Jersey?

Why the fuck is that dog purple? That can’t be good for it.

I love when they’re talking about how they’re absolute BEST friends. Those bitches have known each other for like a week, and they were shitfaced for that entire week. If they’re still friends when MTV stops paying them to be, then I’ll buy it.

‘Me and Jenni have the rest of our lives to stick our heads, up Jionni and Roger’s asses. I think right now is the prime time for us to be together, to just enjoy life as best friends.’ Yes. Because when you’re newly engaged, and pregnant with your fiancee’s child, that’s actually the perfect time to be like ‘oh, hai MTV BFF, let’s fuck off our boyfraaaaaans and hang out ALL THE TIME! Do you wanna come to all those intimate moments that should probably be between me and my baby daddy? You do? Sweet! Sign this contract.’

If I was JWOWW I’d be so pissed that this was my life.

 

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  1. Adele is knocked up, y’all. «

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